WTF (Bill Shatenerrr, You put the Round Burger on the Square Wonderbread, 2010)

After a long period of seclusion from the social side of the internet it is quite evident that after such a period of time when one returns to it, normality does not ensue, and previous customs are ignored. I used to have self imposed rule not to review any releases that were pathetic in every which way possible, I have decided in the interest of public safety to issue the following review.

This release only fits into the collective noun of "music" by virtue of the fact that instruments are present, although whether the users of the instruments have infact ever learnt to play the  instrument is something that is yet to be showcased. With its only redeeming feature being that fact that it is free, this release certainly knows how to aggravate me to the extent of considering going to Manchester and physically lambaste those responsible for putting me through 6 minutes of hair pulling  phonic abuse.
Lets start off with the easy stuff, with a title of Bill Shatnerrr, with an addittion of a 2 added R's and a  switch of his first name with that of one of its derivatives, and an album title of You put the Round Burger on the Square Wonderbread.  I fail to see what the purpose of such titles are, other than being a form of detestable expression of individuality that is as equally annoying as it is absurd, and the same can be said for the music.
Thank God or any other deity you worship if any, that this release isn't Grindcore nor Death Metal as it would of tarnished greatly one of the loves of my life. This is some form of moronic experimental powerviolence/punk, or to quote themselves Biscuitcore, which once again highlights the point their attempt to be individual and possibly innovative has reached a point of grossly ill-conceived absurdity. Within their song structure we can melt it down to three separate blocks. The music is amassed with crazy unharmonias riffs, and when I say crazy I mean it in the same context as applying to describe people who believe they are lemons, these riffs are the worst part of the songs and sound like a funkadelic cat in distress, and the high pitch of them only adds to the misery of the listener. The second elements of the songs are the breakdowns, which although I must confess do not always appeal to me, are weak and fuzzy and general so boring you had no idea it was occuring. Lastly we have the occasional more coherent and conventional guitaring which is often short lived, and just aswell given how mundane and poorly it is played out,. Drumming is also a great source of monotony with a drummer who only seems to be capable of playing the same beat at various speeds, and with his cymbal being akin to that of a dripping tap.
I cant believe people actually come up with this sort of stuff and then thing it is ok to share with other people, its well established that t if you do a shit you certainly don't begin to promote and distribute it amongst other people.  I felt ashamed to have even played it and further shame to think that they are from England aswell, and looking at their myspace they have to date 898 friends which I find surprising, but at the same time not as it supports my proposal to reintroduce survival of the fittest into society, as clearly only those with equal brain processing power to that of a goldfish would ever wish to be associated with such brainless and irritable collection of noises. Feel free to check them out and write a similar rant, however you have been strongly warned.

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